So I suppose it's that time again. Time for me to pull you close by the fire and make extravagant motions with my hands. Yeah, you know what I mean.
But as the cool gaze of the fire wavers between burning your marshmallow or burning your house down, I have the important task of telling you a story. You greedy kids, always wanting stories. I wrack my mind from side to side, looking for something more then puppies or fuzz. You always tell me you hate those kinds of stories. Unless you were lying. You weren't lying, were you mon amour? I should hope not, or I won't be getting you a present this year!
Presents! That's it!
Did you know that one year my friends got a my very own immigrant? Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, but my friends are just that nice. I'm not entirely sure if they obtained it legally, X being an ultimate undercover spy/fireman and all. She might have stolen the immigrant from a store or something! Like she did that sign post and wall!
But even then, I was glad. These are the kinds of things true friends get you- a memory that lasts forever. Sure, you might store them in your attic for years, but one day you'll find their rotting corpse and remember the memories with a smile.
"But," You inject, ya little twerp, "Isn't it kinda illegal to own a person? And let them die? Y-you Murderer!"
Ah ha ha! You make me laugh, with all your age-old wisdom. You silly person.
I would never kill someone! I pledge on my fuzzy soul that I am extremely nice and kind and would hurt a fly but possible not a human.
What your average, perfectly normal sized head doesn't grasp is that it all was a metaphor! For life, the trials we go through and doubt.
Here, let me run it through you one more time.
The immigrant stands for the doubt in our lives. How do we know who comes from what country? It also stands for the out-sourcing of labor to countries like China. Lastly, it stands for the breakable bonds in our lives. My mention of X stealing the immigrant refers to her doing things we don't know about, like drugs or breaking an old person's neck.
The birthday stands the trials in out lives. We face each birthday with a determination to make it good, to make it last. How do we know it will be good? We face birthdays differently then normal days, so I used it in this way. It also stands for the memories of our youth. Don't you remember the days when a box could amuse you for hours and ten cents was a fortune? When we didn't worry, when the sun always shined?When you could go chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool and shooting some b-ball outside of the school?Yeah, I do.
The bird stands freedom, the freedom to be free and free as many fleeing freedom finish friends as we feel to free.
The Tanzanian part stands for Tanzanian pride and African suffering. The T in Tanzanian stands for Tanzania.
Here's how it goes down:
Tanzania
Africa
Not Europe
Zebras
Actually really old
Norway
Infested with wildebeest
A real country
Night at the improv
Hopefully by now your quite normal self has comprehended what I said. I give it a moment. I know how it is for you big kids. Always looking for gas leaks and bombs. I suppose you can't help it, you were trained for it all your life.
I see a sudden look of realization cross your eyes. A sudden enlightenment. It glows into the night and lights up the drenched dark forest which we call home in an unearthly light. Yeah, that pretty much happened to me too.
It fades fast for me, but I suppose not for you. Your body goes limp in a last minute attempt to free yourself, your enlightened eyes lose their charm and move out, leaving looking quite fearful. It seems your time has come. You don't struggle, you don't breathe, you don't move. It's like being stuck in the movies next to a fat woman who slurps her endless supplies of soda and uses your armrest and a little kid who knows the entire plot of the film and tell you all the details via a megaphone in your ear, only both the woman and the kid are sitting right next to you as the seats are missing and whole theater smells suspiciously like cheese and the film you are watching is The last Airbender.
You float up into the light, but it's no longer generated by your (missing and charmless) eyes. It comes from above, supported by a few pillars and possibly a french mule. As you leave me, I can only be entertained.
It is pretty funny, actually.
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